Untitled for now
by Siren Dragon
Summary: Harry is suicidal and cuts himself, but none of his friends notice the change. Can Draco help him?
1. 1

"Oy, Harry."  
Startled, Harry dropped the razor blade he had been holding.  
"What do you want, Ron?" he asked, hiding the cut on his arm as best he could.  
Ron, oblivious to what he had just walked in on, continued. "We need to be down on the pitch in about 10 minutes for practice. Come on mate." With that, Ron turned around and went down to wait with Hermione in the common room. Once alone again, Harry stopped the bleeding and used a glamour to hide his newest design.  
Ever since Sirius had been killed, Harry had been depressed. He started cutting himself because he needed the pain. He needed to know that he was still alive, that he could still feel, that he wasn't emotionless.  
He picked up the razor blade and put it back in the small box of odds and ends he had on the table next to his bed, and then left the dormitory with his broomstick in his hands. Cutting and flying were his only escapes these days. While playing quidditch, he could forget, for a time, the pain of losing the only family he had known. He walked down the stairs and entered the Gryffindor common room, deep in thought.  
"Took you long enough. We have to hurry if we're going to make it on time." Harry made no response, but Ron didn't seem to notice. He was already halfway out the portrait hole, once more engrossed in his conversation with Hermione. She cast a look back at Harry, who was still lost in his own thoughts. She made a mental note to confront him about his silence later.  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
After practice, Ron and Hermione stayed behind to "talk." On the way back to the common room, Harry, once more lost in his thoughts, bumped into someone, sending him sprawling on the floor in the hall and snapping him out of his thoughts and into the present.  
"Potter, why don't you watch where you're going, or do you just need new glasses?" sneered a familiar voice. Malfoy, the very last person he wanted to see right now.  
"Sod off, Malfoy," he said, getting up off the floor and walking away. He didn't care anymore. 'Maybe I should just end it now, once and for all, go and join my mum and dad and Sirius. No one would miss me all that much,' he thought. Entering the common room, he went and sat in one of the chairs facing the fire.  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
Draco watched as Harry walked off without flinging any insults back at him. He had just insulted Potter, and all he got was a "Sod off, Malfoy," and his back. He hadn't even sounded like he cared. His voice had been totally emotionless. 'Something's wrong,' he thought. Then, 'Why should I care?' He didn't like being ignored. Draco turned around and walked away, already making plans of how to get back at the other boy. 'It wasn't enough that he threw my offer of friendship back in my face back in our first year, but now he has to go and ignore me,' he thought angrily. 'What's wrong with him that he doesn't want my friendship? Hell, what's wrong with me that he doesn't want my friendship?' Such were his thoughts until he got so frustrated that he punched the wall, bruising his hand and startling everyone else in the hall. "Damnit!" he yelled, walking towards the Slytherin common room once more.  
  
That night at dinner Draco stayed in the Slytherin common room, thinking about what he was going to do to Harry the next time they saw eachother. 'I could hex him, but I don't think that would serve my purpose. Or I could be nice and offer to help him with something. That would sure freak him out, and it would be quite funny to see the suspicion in his eyes. He couldn't ignore me then, either.' "What could I offer to help him with, though?" he said out loud to himself. Just then, Professor Snape walked into the common room. "You, offer to help someone? This I have to see," he drawled. "Who is this person who has the great Draco Malfoy offering to help him?" Draco, startled, looked up at his head of house. "Oh, hello Sir. I was just trying to think of ways to slip past Potter's guard. He's been too self- absorbed lately, and frankly, I'm getting bored. A verbal sparring match with Potter is always a good form of entertainment, but lately he's been ignoring me. Do you have any suggestions Sir?" He looked at his professor hopefully. Snape just snorted. "You want my opinion on Potter?" he asked incredulously. "No, not your opinion on Potter, your thoughts on what I could or should do to annoy him." Snape just smirked. "I have plenty, none of which would be appropriate. However, if you really want to "help" him, I could always partner you in potions, put my best student with my worst one and hope that you can teach him something. Would that help?" "Yeah, that just might work. Thanks Sev."  
  
Later that night, hungry due to his missed dinner, Draco was sneaking into the kitchen when he heard slight noises coming from an empty classroom. Curious, he went to see who he could get in trouble. What he saw shocked him and as he turned around to leave, he ran into the doorjamb and fell, startling the person in the room. "What are you doing here, Malfoy?" asked a voice from inside the empty classroom. 


	2. 2

Author's note: First off, I want to say thank you to my reviewers: rogue mystique, x Raya, Arianna- thanks for the soccer ball :P, KittyWillow- Snape is Draco's godfather, and he only calls him by his first name when they're alone, Brokendownpalace, Isabelle McCovern, Karuri, LiL AcE ViLLa, The Jean Genie- Wow! No-one's ever said that to me before, thank you. I feel special now :), soyamonkey, DaughterofDeath, Reese Craven, TeamExtremeGurl, BlackFire4, green eyed dragon, Whispyraven- no, I don't cut, but I've read a few books about people who have, and I've done my research (well, I hope), Ana-pj. This is the first fic I've ever written, and I wasn't sure how it would turn out. I realized after I had posted the first chapter that I didn't have disclaimers so, here goes:  
  
Summary: Harry is suicidal and cuts himself, but none of his friends notice the change. Can Draco help him? Disclaimer: Only in my dreams am I J.K. Rowling, and I thank her for letting me play with (and torture) her characters *evil grin* I own nothing but the plot Rating: PG-13 for violence and mature content  
  
Now, on with the story  
  
Last time: ________________________________________________________________________ "What are you doing here, Malfoy?" asked a voice from inside the empty classroom. ________________________________________________________________________  
  
"I could ask the same of you, Potter. What could Gryffindor's "Golden Boy" be doing out of his dorm, late at night, in an abandoned classroom?" asked Draco, his trademark sneer firmly in place. "That's none of your fucking business, Malfoy," Harry replied hastily, trying to get past Malfoy who was now firmly planted on two feet, blocking the doorway, effectively trapping Harry in the room. "Get out of my way, Malfoy." "And why should I?" Draco asked tauntingly. "Because I told you to?" Harry asked hopefully. "Because...because you told me to?" Draco burst out laughing. "And since when have I done anything because you told me to? You've been ignoring me, Potter, and I don't like being ignored. Now, what are you doing here?" "That's none of your business," Harry said again, less convincingly this time. "Why don't you just let me leave, please?" 'Merlin, please don't let me break down in front of him' Harry thought, trying hard not to cry in front of his arch rival. Draco, sensing Harry's weakness, just pushed harder. "Come on, Harry. Whatever it is you were doing in there, you can't get in any more trouble than you're going to be in already." "How the hell would you know, Malfoy?" That last comment of his made Harry remember who it was he was talking to, and instead of breaking down, he blew up. "You couldn't possibly understand. You want to get me in trouble that badly, go ahead. Go tell professor Snape that you saw me out of my dorm well after I should have been. If you hate me that much, maybe you should just kill me right now. That would be the kindest thing you could do to me right now. Just kill me. If you won't do that for me, grant me death, then just get out of my way and leave me alone. Stop trying to talk to me, stop trying to pick fights with me. From now on I am dead to you." Surprised by Harry's outburst, Draco moved out of the doorway and watched as Harry Potter, his one-time enemy, walked away.  
  
The next morning before breakfast, Draco went in search of Professor Snape. He found him in his private quarters in the dungeons. As much as he hated to admit it, he was worried about Harry "I'm sorry to bother you, professor, but I have something important to talk to you about. Last night, after I talked to you, I ran into Potter." Draco then proceeded to tell Professor Snape what had happened between the two of them the night before. By the time he was done, Snape had a slightly worried look on his face. "Thank you, Draco. I will deal with Potter. You should probably go up to breakfast now," Snape said in a rather distracted tone of voice. As soon as Draco left, Snape went to talk to Dumbledore and tell him his now more plausible suspicions regarding Harry.  
  
"I'd better get going now," Harry told his friends once he had finished breakfast. "I have potions with the Slytherins first." He walked off, ignoring the worried looks his "friends" were throwing at him. He was tired of trying to keep up the pretense of caring about anything. He just wanted to get through the rest of the year. "Harry, your presence has been requested in the headmaster's office," Professor Snape told him the moment he walked into the potions classroom, all signs of his usual sneer gone, and a slightly worried look in it's place. "Yes Sir," Harry said, wondering at the change in his least favorite professor's attitude. He was so caught up in his thoughts and speculating, that it wasn't until he got to the stone gargoyle guarding Dumbledore's office that he realized that he didn't know the password. Standing there, in front of the gargoyle and feeling like an idiot, he was glad when it started moving, revealing the hidden staircase. He quickly stepped onto it, not wanting to climb anymore stairs than he absolutely had to. When he entered Dumbledore's office, he was surprised to see Draco sitting in one of the chairs in front of the headmaster's desk. "Hello Harry, why don't you sit down. Lemon drop?" he asked, offering Harry the box of candies. "What's he doing here?" Harry asked, nodding his head at Draco. "Why don't you sit down and let's talk," suggested Dumbledore, putting the rejected box of candy back in his desk. Harry sat down in the chair next to Draco, looking at the headmaster expectantly. "I have heard many disturbing things today, Harry, many of them concerning you." At that, Harry turned and glared at the boy sitting beside him. "What have you told him, you git?" he asked angrily. "Harry, that's enough," said Dumbledore sternly. "What's he told you, Professor? That I don't care whether I live or die? That I've been having suicidal thoughts? That I cut..." He stopped abruptly, turning away from both pairs of surprised eyes in shame. 'Shit! Now you've done it, you idiot,' he thoughtt o himself. 'How are you gonna get out of that one?' he asked himself. "I...I mean...I..." then he slumped down further into his chair, wishing a hole would open up beneath him and swallow him so he wouldn't have to deal with the two pairs of probing eyes he was sure were searching his soul. "Actually, he hasn't told me anything yet. We were just waiting for you to get here before we started talking about this." Harry tore his gaze from Draco to look at Dumbledore, then he looked back at Draco, back at Draco, then at Dumbledore again with an expression of utter confusion. Then he whipped his head back around to look at Draco again, a look of pure horror slowly replacing the confusion. "Who else did you tell?" he demanded, as his anger took hold again. "You told Professor Snape, didn't you?" Draco met Harry's eyes unconcernedly. "So what if I did? You were telling me to kill you. I had to tell someone." The dark-haired boy looked surprised for a second, then narrowed his eyes, glaring at the other boy again. "How caring of you," he said sarcastically. I didn't know that you would be worried about little ol' me, and in case you couldn't tell, you seem to be the only one who is." 'Shut up, Harry, just shut up NOW!' "How does it feel, Malfoy? You finally get to see the "Great" Harry Potter brought down a couple notches. Hey, here's an idea. Let's take him down a couple more, shall we? Finite Incantatum." Both Draco and Dumbledore, by now forgotten by both teens, looked at Harry in confusion, until he rolled up his sleeves. His arms were covered in crisscrossing scars, some an angry red and obviously new. There were also some older, pinkish ones. "Well?" he asked after a moment of silence in which Draco and Dumbledore just stared at his arms in shock. "What do you have to say now? Go run and tell your friends, Professor Snape. Tell them how messed up the boy-who-lived is, I really don't give a fuck." That said, he got up, turned around, and left Dumbledore's office. Draco and Dumbledore just sat there and watched him leave. All of a sudden Draco got up and went after Harry. "Harry, wait up!" he called, but the dark-haired boy was already gone. Guessing that Harry would go somewhere he could be alone, he headed towards the Owelry. When he didn't find him there, he decided to try the astronomy tower. However, he was not prepared for the sight that greeted him as soon as he made it up the stairs into the tower.  
  
A/N: I'm sorry, but this is as far as I've written. If u don't like it, then u can leave, but reviews would be very much appreciated before you do. I'm also sorry about the formatting. It just won't format the way I want it to, so I guess we just have to live with it. And I also want to say thank you to my wonderful beta reader and sometimes muse, Lady Shade 


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